How I Learned That Listening is Key to Conversions in Senior Living

I’ll never forget the words I heard 40 years ago, during my initial attempt to fill The Gatesworth.

A woman named Elizabeth was touring our newly opened community.

She was polite, quiet, and holding a small notebook packed with questions.

I kicked into gear—gave her a very polished tour. Hit all the high notes. Explained our vision for senior living.

I wrapped with my best, “Any questions for me?”

She nodded, smiled, and said:

“You seem great. I just don’t know if you really understand what this is like for me.”

Oof.

She was exactly right!

I had focused so much on showcasing the community and our vision for her future, I forgot to center the conversation around her.

There was so much more to her life story, her current situation…her feelings.

That moment has stuck with me ever since.

It’s when I started shifting from transactional selling into what we now call Prospect-Centered Selling.

A Paradigm Shift

Instead of trying to impress with our amenities, I got obsessed with understanding the person, the situation and the emotions behind someone even considering a move.

I researched, practiced and learned to ask better questions. I slowed down and began spending a lot more time with a lot fewer Prospects.

I stopped assuming that every Prospect was ready to buy.

I also stopped trying to “handle” objections and started listening for and exploring what they might really be about.

There's a part two to the Elizabeth story. We met again in her breakfast room, this time with her adult daughter. Elizabeth had the same legal pad and same reserved energy, but with a different focus and a very different tone.

Not long after the daughter got started asking questions, Elizabeth looked up and said,

“This is the first time someone made me feel like it’s okay to be unsure.”

That’s when I knew I was on the "right track". The more I listened and asked questions, the more Elizabeth talked. The more she talked, the further she advanced towards “ready”.

The day she signed a lease, as shown in the photo above this article, was the day that I learned how to listen my way forward, to a conversion.

So, yeah, the myth I had to unlearn?

Great selling in the world of senior housing isn’t about having the best product or the best pitch. It’s about creating the kind of emotional trust and space where people feel empowered to be completely honest about their fears and doubts.

Change occurs in older adults, if at all, only when they tell us about themselves.

Our job is to encourage, support and motivate them to do the telling.